Now that I have something to sit on, I need something to eat with. Cutlery - what a quandary!
I have looked everywhere in this vast metropolis, with no joy. Merchandise on the market is either too expensive, too old-fashioned, or too ambitious. Why, oh why do designers think they need to be creative with the shape of a spoon? It is a spoon. It is meant to ladle soup. The shape has been standardised over time because it makes sense.
Even the Scandinavians failed me.
Though in my muttering progress it occurred to me that a solution might be closer to hand than expected, and wrote to my mother. Why yes, she replied, I inherited the Lavender silverware - a complete set of Chevron (aka Standard Oil) commemorative cutlery.
This brings up many practical questions, like whether or not one can pack a gold-plated service for twelve in carry-on luggage. But also more importantly, how will I feel eating from the forks I remember so distinctly from childhood Thanksgiving dinners?
Difficult to guess, but I'm sensing that the answers will be fraught and frightening. And anyway, I need to eat now, not whenever I can arrange for delivery.
So instead of spending real money on new stuff (preferred option) or shipping family heirlooms (next best option) I bought off ebay.
£6 for a midcentury no-name set still in the original box. My reputation as a perverse and obsessive cheapskate holds!