I am incredibly stupid
First off - hi all! I am never on hipmama anymore these days and I miss it dearly. I had to cut myself off because I was getting too addicted. I still lurk every now and then but not nearly as often as I'd like. I hate to only come back when I'm in a bind but I honestly don't know where else to turn for advice. I've gotten myself into a mess so idiotic in such an irresponsible manner that I can't bring myself to tell any of my friends or family IRL. They already think I'm the world's biggest fuck-up. I don't need to give them any more proof of that.
I'm even WAY embarrassed to bring it up here. But I need to get it out.
So in an an act of desperation I did probably the stupidest thing I've EVER done (and I've done lots of pretty stupid shit) and took out one of those internet payday loans - ya know, where they wire $300 into your account and allow them to deduct $390 on your next payday. Except... the fine print is that you need to notify them 3 business days in advance if you want to pay that full amount. Otherwise they "renew" the loan and - kindly souls that they are - only charge the $90 fee. So it's like you took out another $300 all over again and another $90 fee is assessed. So you're out $90 and you haven't paid down the loan. And then a TON of these loan companies start calling and texting you and sending e-mails: "Need more money? You're pre-approved! Just click here and get cash in as little as one hour!!" The first loan was do-able. I could afford to pay it back. But it was so easy to do and to get the money that I convinced myself that I could handle another one... and another. Then when payday came around and the fees went through I had to take out MORE loans so that I could still cover my regular expenses like rent and food and daycare, etc.
Before I even realized what I was doing the whole thing sno-balled out of control and now I can't even afford to pay the twice-a-month fees. They won't work with me on any payment plans (why would they when they have me by the balls, so to speak?) Regular debt consolidation programs can't even work with these payday lenders. There are some companies that deal exclusively in consolidating payday loans butI've heard that lots of those companies are scammers as well so I don't know who to trust or how to get out of any of this.
I can't even close my bank account because the bank says it actually takes 30 days for an account to actually close for good. If, during that time, any money is wired in or any checks or EFT withdrawals submitted then the account automatically re-opens and the closure process starts all over again. It doesn't matter if I have no funds available because then the attempted EFT withdrawals could still go through and overdraft fees assessed or the transactions get returned and I'm stuck with a $35 overdraft fee each. Since these withdrawals are set up to occur twice a month I will essentially NEVER be able to close my account and the fees will keep piling up.
Advice online says that the best course of action is to suck it up and ask for a loan from a friend or relative but that's not an option. None of my friends have ANY savings or disposable income. And my family is in dire straits right now. My grandparents just moved into an assisted living facility which has added a huge financial burden and even my mom, who's usually always been there to bail me out,is broke.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice or commiseration would be appreciated. I know that what I did was beyond foolish. I knew it at the time but I convinced myself that I had it under control. Please, no lectures about how collosally moronic it is to deal with these kind of scumbag companies. I just need non-judgmental advice really badly. Please.
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i could have written this myself girl. i had to close the account let it go to collections THEN they will work with u on a payment plan. it messes with ur credit BUT if u do pay it off itl b ok. there is definitely a reason these are illegal in alot of states now. the only other option is to try and get a loan from a bank or credit union to pay them all off at once but if u cant do that which i couldnt ur gonna have to just close that account u will not end up in court or any of that shit but if u dont eventually pay it will go on ur credit report. it sucks but thats bout all u can do mama.
Jessica
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind~~Dr.Seuss
i've closed bank accounts with a negative balance before. well, i "inactivated" them. i don't think they're allowed to knowingly let transactions go through when you've given them written notice that you are closing your account. i did it with a certified letter. the account was "inactive." meaning all transactions, if they came in, were rejected. but the negative balance remained till i paid it. or, in my case, contested it and won.
i don't have any experience with payday loans, as they are illegal in my state. for good reason. the scammers who do this, are the same scammers who do the "credit counseling and debt consolidation" services. i wish i could help you. my best guess is just don't pay it. don't deposit anything in that account and just ignore it and advise them to sue you. then in court, offer them $300.
but that's my answer to everything. fuck banks.
yup im stictly cash an carry now!! i told my bank that i had told those companies to stop trying to draw the money but that they wouldnt which then makes THEIR activity fraudulent
first off = some good old fashioned love is being sent your way. please try not to worry about this, you can change your situation.
secondly - BofA can absolutely "block" businesses from taking money from your account, they did it for me a few years ago when i was in a similar situation, the only problem can be "the timing" issue, you have to do it before they try to collect the money. unless their polices have completely changed, i would check back into this.
i would call them back and insist on it, and if they give you grief, and you're forced to close the account, *and you need another one for direct deposit, etc.*, open a new account somewhere else, just prior to ditching them. it can be harder to open an account from scratch, depending on the situation.
most importantly - you're not a victim, you can heal and not beat yourself up for getting involved with payday loans. you are not alone!
you also have the right to stop them from calling your work, if you need too - and worst case scenario they call you non-stop (lovely voice activated computer robo calls!) or real live folks call you and try to make a deal with you to get you to pay. you either work out the deal or clean your credit up when you can.
bonus, - you can get better at managing money, you can make any changes you need to in order to get in control of your finances in the future. don't give up.
P.S. - denessa is 100% right! collections is usually the way they go with this, and even then you have options.
love and take care - CX
1. anyone who would say that and know you, isn't a friend, period.
2. i wouldn't bother with what other people think it terms of being a "deadbeat" or not, i think the only thing that matters is that you find a solution to your temporary problem, and feel better about it.
you have bigger fish to fry and a whole life to live the way you want too.
take care - cX
YOU ARE doing it! keep going!
love and hearts - CX
my account was b of a also the worst bank EVER if u go in person u get much farther i actually got them to close the account and reverse the fees an i had direct deposit of my paycheck so it was hard
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Payday loans are illegal in my state too. I actually live in a state where the law tends to side heavily with consumers. I think what I'm most afraid of is people finding out. That sounds so stupid as I write it... I feel like I shouldn't care but I just really hate people regarding me as this irresponsible loser who can't take care of herself. It's funny because the reason why I'm so broke all the time is because I'm lucky enough to have a job where I earn a decent salary. Actually... no - it's only luck in the sense that I know there are lots of highly skilled and/or educated people who are very hard workers who are having trouble finding a good job these days. I work my ASS off in a very stressful & often thankless position (ya know... just like motherhood which I also do full time). But I digress... My point is that this country sucks butt when it comes to actually helping families survive. Grrr.
Anyways, thanks so much mamas. I feel better already. I knew that I would. Tomorrow is the withdrawal date so I guess I'll see what happens. It's totally possible that the bank is lying to me. It's Bank of America and they are pretty much evil. I opened an acct there because I let them reel me in with the "convenience" of the sheer number of atms they have. Over the past year and a half I have paid them THOUSANDS of dollars in overdraft or return item fees, etc. And when I call to try and complain and get some help/relief they've just chastised me and shamed me into submission. And it totally worked.