gratitude is in demand today - here is mine - humpday.
1. 
2. spirituality can be found in the most unspiritual places, kind of funny how that works, huh? i am serious about this, but i am also laughing & smiling as i say it - you can have whatever you want, just ask.
3. so today was banner, i texted, made calls, i have a few more calls to make before the night is through - i reach out, because i am asked to do it - my soul requires me to move - i am glad - i appreciate my life - i handle not only what is required & expected, but mostly: what i want/need/desire. my heart is all that matters, period. my face was in the sunshine most of the day and it felt good.
4. you should see the 30 or 40 films on my floor right now - i took them home to critique, i carried them into block buster in a fedex box, only to ask them when my current films were due, then came home to 3 netflix in my mail box. i go gaga over films. i am gaga and like it that way!
5. i've watched 6 shorts and one was really good - a few could have been re-shot or tightened up and they would have made the cut - it's never to late to change things in your life - movies are no different. you can always swap things out, wipe the lens and go back and rethink the story. i like striving. i love this craft and i'm committed to learning every trick i can. tricks are nice, so is real life. it's never too late to be yourself or live in your skin or better yet - live out your hearts desire.
6. pick one thing to be happy about today, and do it.
7. i was totally embarrassed today as my bosses at the NWFF asked me about "computer love" and "rescue" - i am such a dork, i guess!
8. i came up with a script idea that i will start to write tonight, i want to work on my graffiti film next year, but if there are any changes, i want to make a new doc about women coming out of jail and transitioning back into society. the challenges they face, the services that are offered to them, the works. there are a few good films out there about jail and the effects, statistics, real people, families impacted, dollars and cents, etc., but very little is ever spoken about in terms of women and their real life situations post jail, and how it permanently (or not) impacts them and their families - i can write this movie and present it with integrity. the stereotypes vs. the reality of what happens after someone does time - a lot can be said about this.
9. my body, mind, soul and spirit are requesting me to slow down over the next few days, i can feel a shift, so i'll do it. i have been full force all year - really the last 3 years, it scares me to stop, i've built up such a momentum - i can switch gears, so i will.
10. i am happy and grateful to be in my shoes. no matter what, i asked for this life, i created it, and i can make it even better.
11. i love you - don't forget!
do something special for yourself - and don't ask why!
your friend - cX
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Sorry its taken me a long time to comment, I am in Oxford and have only just got my internet hooked up! I love the picture, I just took one just like that!
I love the idea about the prison doc, there were times in my life when prison could have been a reality. Thank God it didn't happen cause I wouldn't have been able to follow the path I,m on now BUT what if it had, I'd still be the same person but I would be looked at in a totally different way.
My man deals with discrmination secondary to his prison record daily, I get very annoyed, he is totally accepting, like I did it I knew better, these are my consequences. It prevents him doing work with certain groups like young people and kids even though his record does not include anything vioent or wierd or sexual, just straight up street rat thievery and thuggery! Its such a waste!
AS a society I think we should consider a total wipe clean for certain things, obviously excluding sex and certain types of violence, if certain criteria are met. we are wasting people, our most precious resource.
oxford is stunning, peaceful, clean and serene i need this! make that gear change DC you deserve it. I am picturing a clean white cleansing energy flowing through your body, life and apartment and putting you in this best spece possible for a new academic year!
Take care, all my love meds
P.S. I am considering purchasing some black latex leggings for sexand fashion purposes! What do you think?
I love the name paloma, my first perfume obsession was paloma picasso, she sounds like a great gal and its a lovely honour your awarding her. I'm feeling her on the accent stuff, I got a good regional one going on too and even here in Oxford it makes jaws drop, they treat you like a mermaid or something! Lucky I'm comfortable with attention!
It IS like sherlock holmes style, so beautiful and, if I had to pick a word, affluent. I start in hospital tomorrow, I'm gonna get up and do some aerobics and conquer general surgery!!! The room is lovely too and free!! I,ve met two of my flatmates, Victor from Hong Kong who is studying in St pertersburg and a Russion guy who hasn't told me his name. The communal areas are uuurrcchhh, but, whatever, I'm not becoming MUM.
My fella is coming down next weekend and we are doing a drve through the Costwolds called the Romance Road and staying in a lovely bed and breakfast. I got to tell you Christy this man has totally woken me up sexually after years. Not only does he have the consummate physical skills to get the job done he has this dirty slant of mind and this emotional presence that takes things up a level and a half. I am doing all kinds of crazy stuff like a kid, for instance sending him dirty pictures by Phone!! I am officially part of the sexting generation!
Take care of yourself and mars
Love meds
i remember this one girl, the commercials were dreamy! this was a popular perfume in the 80's!
paloma is the best person i've ever met, i love her dearly - i'm glad that she's no longer living with aids. on a positive note - she's always around me, i feel closer to her more than ever.
the romance a.k.a. "romancing the bone" this has made me happier than you know! i always look forward to your updates on how you guys are doing!
your man is white hot! he is on fire for you! i'm so glad that you met when you did, it's been exciting to watch you fall in love - i appreciate the fact that you share what you're feeling, and to think that you manifested the best kind of love! this romance is all that you wanted and more!
AND it's only going to get better! this guy is worth it, he knows a goddess when he sees one!
i've been thinking about how perfect this has been, everything is in order, keep going. don't stop!
romance road, his presence, his touch, all of it - this up coming weekend will be perfect! enjoy it! the universe sent him in the nick of time!
when men are present, they really care, this is how they show it - you can trust this man.
if people are buggin' out on your accent in oxford, they are fools! when will people shut up about this?!! if i were there, i would throw eggs at them on the street!
what the hell was i thinking? i had no idea that the sherlock holmes city was real! i am a total nerd?!! i could only see the lush green grass and lawns & stuff - lot's of sunlight above tall trees? i can still see this in my mind!
where is guy richie when you need him?!!
i love you girl, don't forget!
your friend - CX
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i knew you were getting settled into oxford, the way you described it, i'm picking up a lot of greenery and nice people, what are the shops like? is there real cobblestone there? have i seen too many sherlock homes posters?! *i am a nut!*. i can't wait to see england - i know it's a special place!
did i tell you about paloma? my very best friend who died of aids in 2001, was *is!* english/scottish - she had a marvelously thick scottish accent - i rarely talk about it - amercian's and they're obession/rudeness with accents is lame! paloma used to say she could tell when people only liked her for the "accent" - but this story is funny -
once she had a mouth full of cereal and she tried talking to me - we both laughed so hard, she almost choked. she lived in england on the streets for a long time, before coming to the u.s. - from 15 until 20 ish, i talk to her everyday - she's never left my side.
she lived illegally in the u.s. the whole time she was here and she desperately wanted to become a citizen, i never spoke a word about this *it was really a family secret*, but now that's she gone, she doesn't mind me saying it out loud - she tried several times to do it, and couldn't - seattle became her home, she died in her apartment just 15 blocks from my house - i love paloma so much, every award i win will be dedicated to her and people living with aids.
i really care about you and your man! this is sad, i know that it's true - people face so much discrimination after being locked up for any amount of time - i was shocked to find out that a few of my closest friends now have done time, it really hurt to hear the stories. the positive is that he continues to be successful in spite of the road blocks that would have held most people back.
i also support the clean wipe theory - especially if it was a non-violent crime or sex crime, so many women go in on drug related charges, and do years of time in the u.s. it's bullshit.
thank you for supporting my doc, i feel the same way - had anything been different in my life, i'm certain that i could have been involved in more scandalous acts - gang life, etc. living on the streets like i did as a teenager, i definitely saw a variety of bad things go down - it's inevitable. i think it would be nice to let the women tell their stories, make it more of a healing process and bring some awareness to the seattle.
and beyond.
when will you see your man during the oxford stay? keep dreamin up the big stuff girl - you're doing it, everyday!
i am a bit bogged down now, i need to free up some energy in my body, and i'm going back into counseling tomorrow, i really need it - i feel like things have shifted quickly and i need to catch up.
i'm going to read, write, refocus and channel this week - Rescue is almost complete!
love you and take care - enjoy your stay!
CX