Mascara and other missing treasures

Don't even go there. I am a housecleaner. It bothers me that you would write this. I take my job, my profession seriously. Even before I did this job, when I worked at a custom window-covering joint, and rich people would complain that their housecleaners had "ruined" their (obviously old) mini-blinds, blah blah blah, I could see that those folks were "blind" to their own, uh, issues. I could see that they LIKED to complain about the people they hired. Liked complaining far more than doing something to improve themselves, far more than looking at their own shortcomings.
I have clients now who like to complain. Who will call me and ask if I've seen such-and-such a thing, who will short me on money or ask me, casually, to move heavy furniture (both, today). People who come to me first if they have misplaced something--
If you were my client and you called me and asked if I had seen your mascara, you know what I would do? I would, very gently, do exactly what I do with my kids. I would ask you the last time you remember seeing the mascara, and then I would ask you to pretend to hold it in your hand, and act out carrying it around, and retrace your steps. And if it wasn't in the (drawer? Handbag? Coat pocket? Bathroom shelf? Laundry basket? Shoe on the closet floor? Top of the fridge? Pencil caddy?) where you last put it, I would ask if you had gone through the same steps with every member of your family. And then I would assure you that I would keep my eyes open for it the next time I came for a visit.
Please, do your professional housecleaner the courtesy of trying to find your own mascara before accusing her or her employee of taking it.

Here's a question: are the missing items things that you would normally wear together? Like 2 shades of eyeshadow that work together plus a liner and a mascara? If the items that are missing are of a group that you normally use together, then it's just a matter of figuring out where you used it last.

My daughter lost her train ticket last month. As that is a big monthly expense, I was livid. She swore somebody took it. I was skeptical.

It reappeared two days after it expired. It was in her backpack, stuck under the vinyl cover of a binder. Instead of putting into the clear plastic holder on the outside of the backpack where it belongs, she put it loose inside of the backpack (dumb thing to do with a piece of valuable paper that is smaller than a credit card, but what she did nonetheless)where it slipped into an impossibly small opening and disappeared from view. We had dumped the backpack out and looked in every pocket, but the stealthy thing remained hidden from view until it was useless...then it slid back out to mock us.

I also lost my Costco ID once...found it three years later on top of the medicine chest in the bathroom. Yes, I dusted the top of the medicine chest at least once in three years, but did so with one of those extension wand things, so never actually looked up there til I climbed up to change a light fixture. I have no idea how it got there.

BTW, your sock monsters teleported here this morning and took the one pair of underpants I had that was neither too big nor too small, and did not see fit to ride up and crawl about as if alive. Gobbled them right out of the washing machine.

I hope the makeup turns up.

till i saw that you didn't actually accuse the house cleaner, just thought about it.

my house cleaner tells me all the time of these obtuse accusations of theft. apparently, whenever someone loses something, the house cleaner stole it. like, as i've pointed out before, tiny breast pump valves. funny shit. till you have to rely on people like that for your living.

i found a set of keys that was missing for a year in a pair of pants that i had apparently not worn for a year. i once found a $100 bill in a coat i hadn't worn in a year. this is my life. i find new stuff all the time.