Wow, it's been a while

So, I know it's been some time since I last posted. My life dramatically changed over the last season. I moved into a really awesome apartment, 2 outta 3 of my daughters started school full time, I now have the chance to make art again and I am totally on a spree...

And the juicy news, something so new to me, I am left in a whirlwind of confusion.... I began crushing on a friend of mine. This gets complicated.... He was our unofficial partner in the project my (former)husband and I were working on. I was his landlord. He was dating/ living with a friend of mine. Then the bottom was pulled out of the project. My relationship ended with my husband. His relationship got rocky. I began crushing on him, we continued to be friends. His relationship ended and about a month later, we crossed the frienship line.

How do I even process all of this!!!!
To have this amazing guy go from a friend, to a crush, to something more.... I just can't tell which way is up. His ex just found out and is HATIN that this is happening. I feel like such an asshole friend. There is quite a stir of drama throughout our tiny community. I feel so exposed all of a sudden, and I have no idea what this relationship even is.

We have amazing chemistry as friends, and so I just learned, as lovers too. It is quite socially awkward to navigate..... But only because of our past. As individuals, in this moment, there is nothing awkward about us together at all.

The truth is, it's been 9 years since I last fell for somebody. I hardly even know what's going on inside me in all this. I don't really know what I want from a relationship other than that warm fuzzy feeling.

So there is where I am at. Wacky, just absolutely coo coo.