snacks for cranky husband?
What kinds of snacks do you all keep around for your partner? I'm so sick of the whining, "there's no food in the house!" when I've got a half full pantry and a fridge full of possibilities. So to dh baby carrots dipped in almond butter, or baked spinach nuggets do not make a good snack. Some things that he likes: ritz crackers with Cheeze Whiz, string cheese, jalapeno poppers, cashews. Think of this as a challenge to come up with snacks for a large toddler, lol. Are there any appetizers, think classic American, not necessarily healthy, that I could premake and keep in some refrigerated tupperware? Thanks for your help,
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Oh, thank goodness- I thought I was the only one with this problem. My big issue is that any effort I make is short lived- because he'll either eat the entire tupperware full of snack food (e.g. the 5 banana nut muffins he ate this weekend as he passed through the kitchen right after I baked them), or if he thinks it's something too healthy (like the strawberry rhubarb bread that I put a little too much flaxmeal in) I'll end up trying to eat all of it before it goes bad.
I can't wait to see some good ideas from the other mamas here!
I bought DH a bag of potato chips and his own jar of french onion dip this weekend and he was as happy as a kid in a candy store. He thrives on cheez-its and pre-sliced snack cheese (some brand actually makes this, sells it in a square brick, but its already sliced for snacking). If you want to "fix" something, you can make those pinwheels I've seen (but never eaten)...I think you spread a tortilla with cream cheese and, if you want, a spicy thing like jalapeno jelly, then layer with cheese and deli meat, roll up and slice. Yuck to me but lots of people love them. They would tupperware well. He does alot of pepperoni and cheese slices together. More yuck. Maybe the bacon-wrapped dates I have heard about? And, finally, how about frozen swedish meatballs simmered in barbecue sauce in the crockpot? They go nicely with dinner rolls, I hear. Don't ask me- I don't eat any of this crap and, for the most part, neither will my 3 yo, but the hubby? He loves it.
Does he think about what snacks to keep around the house for you? Next time he whines about this, tell him to buy his own effin' snacks, or eat what is in the house, because there are actual children you need to care for. Crimeny. You are NOT his mother. Really. My KIDS figure out their own snacks.
"Mediocrity knows nothing higher than itself; but talent instantly recognizes genius"--Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
haha, i was thinking along the same lines but then i had to try to remember what it was like to be married. different mentality.
I'm kinda with Shades here. My DH is in charge of his own snacks. I mean, if I'm going to the grocery store and there is something in particular he's craving he'll let me know. But if he's in the mood for something or whatever, he'll go get it himself. I don't play like that 
I know it sounds ridiculous, but it's mostly selfish of me, because he forgets to eat/could go all day without eating, and then gets to 4:30 and is so hungry that he puts a frozen pizza in the oven or eats some crap he picks up at the gas station and then won't be hungry for dinner until 8:00... So in order to have a family dinner every night and to get something fresh/nonprocessed in him so that he doesn't die of a heart attack at age 40, I think about what snacks are around for him.
i added my comment before seeing yours. you said it much better. seeing this thread is like bizarro world to me. how does an adult plan the meals and snacks of another adult? it's like a twilight zone episode, where the father and child change places and the mother doesn't know until she's timing when a grown ass man ought to getting hungry. picture a slow zoom-out of a johnny knoxville looking man with pubes hanging out his diaper, sitting in a high chair next to an actual child in a high chair, both screaming that there's nothing to eat.
sorry briefcandle, i know it's not what you asked for, but it really is odd. i don't know any women who do this for their husbands. to each her own and all that, it just strikes me peculiar.
My husband likes carrots, apples, sliced cucumbers, and sliced tomato on toasted bread. If you bake, make cookies and keep them in a cookie jar, go healthy like oatmeal cookies, peanut butter. oh! rice balls are also awesome for the tupperware-type snacks that he can also take to work, just make some rice and season it with whatever rice seasoning you like, then while the rice is warm form it into golf-ball sized balls.
Left-overs are also good for snacks, you can take just about any kind of leftover and make little party hat sandwiches out of them. Like say we have left-over chili, I will toast 4 (or however many) slices of whole wheat bread, then slice them into little cracker-sized squares. Spoon some chili on each, top them with another square, the stick a toothpick in each one. Mercury Man likes these a lot! says it makes him feel festive 
i'm really impressed that you even think about what snacks are available/around/you can make/buy for your husband! i mean, it is not my thang and i wouldn't do it, but i didn't even consider that people actually do think about what snacks to make/have around for their husbands. i don't have any suggestions, as i only make/think about snacks for my kids. but maybe you could just tell him to make a list of things he would like you to get at the grocery store (something else i don't do - the grocery shopping for the family! lol! but i do stop by the store sometimes for odds and ends or snacks for our kids). or he can give you a list of all the foodstuff you have made in the past that he likes so you have a few surefire things to make. then, if you like food prep/cooking you could try something new once a week or something.
and i have to ask, is this something you like to do? i'm assuming you do. and, does he show annoyance if you don't do it? does he expect you to think about his snacks? or does he genuinely appreciate you doing this? which to me would mean if one week there was no snacks in the house instead of getting upset he would make his own snacks and maybe even offer to make some for you. i dunno, maybe when my kids are older and i have more energy and headspace to think, i may do something similar myself as i like doing nice things for hal - so i'm not knocking your generosity towards your husband.
it's the little nice things and small kindnesses that make a happy marriage 
especially because it gets paid back tenfold. least that's been my experience 
exactly. and that's what i'm saying. i mean, i completely get the 'make your own fucking snacks' response, because before i really thought about it, that was actually my knee-jerk reaction to this post. then i thought about it and i also think for hal and i, doing nice things for each other that fall outside our real responsibilities, is another way to show each other how much we care. doing nice things for someone you love is not the same as treating them like a child, it is a genuine way to show love - just like sex, affection, and words. and some people really need that to feel loved, so i don't think there is anything wrong with that.
can't he get his own snacks if he doesn't like what's in the house? or do the grocery shopping, or at least put what he wants on the list?
just what i was thinking! 
My husband also likes cherry tomatoes and blackberries for snacking, which is great in the summer because we grow these. and he likes those corn tortilla chips, the low-salt ones. Walnuts! are also good snacks, if you can get your husband to eat those that's half the battle because they are very fulling and hit the same mind zones that chocolate and ice cream do, you know what I mean. My husband likes these after a long day at work, driving home. and just a handful is often enough to curb appetite till dinner and give you a late-afternoon boost. Boiled eggs are another good snack option, my husband likes egg salad sandwiches sometimes for an afternoon snack.
to anyone else if this is how things work in BC's house. She's happy, that's how things work over there. If things work differently in your house that's great for you. I really don't see how tossing a few extras in the cart on grocery day is putting anyone out. At my house this is how it works too; DH and I are nice to each other all the time, washing each others plate or bringing coffee in the morning or a cup of tea if one of us is in the bath. Those little things make a huge difference for some people. I'm one of them! Yes, I could stand in line behind DH while he rinses his own plate so I can rinse mine, then again at the door of the garage while he tosses his napkin into the laundry basket so I can toss mine in there too - but why not offer to take his napkin for him while he offers to take my plate? You're pouring yourself a glass of wine, why not ask your partner if they want one, too? You're already at the store doing the weeks' shopping (and in my house it's always me cause I have the car, credit cards and the time to do so); why not grab some stuff you know your partner likes to snack on?
I don't see where anyone said you shouldn't do nice things for your partner. I do very nice things for my DH and he does nice things for me in return. He clears my plate, I get him a drink. I don't think anyone implied you should do otherwise. And of course I buy him food along with mine and DS's when I go shopping. The issue, at least for me, is that she said he actually "whines" that there is no food in the house when she has already done the "nice" thing of shopping and does indeed have good food in the house. If my husband ever whined at me like a child that he was hungry and wanted a snack and didn't want anything I had already "nicely" provided, then he can get his own damn snack. Cause I will not have a grown man, or any other adult, whine at me for anything. Sorry, I don't see this as being a cold, mean bitch who won't get her poor hubby a snack at the store. Yeah, I do very nice things for my guy, and he would not dare to whine at me like a bratty two year old in return.
Sorry if this seems bitchy, I'm tired and running on little sleep. But I just resented the tone of "if you don't fix your whiney husband a special snack when he bitches for it, well then you just aren't nice to him. You should just try to be NICE to each other!".
yeah, that is why i asked brief some questions regarding how her husband is with this snack thing. i mean, if hal ever really whined to me about needing good snacks, i'd laugh in his face and tell him to feel free to pick some up at the store. asking is one thing, whining and complaining is another. i just wasn't sure about how serious her dh's "whining" really is and didn't want to assume the worst of him. brief seems to take his whining lightly, so maybe its not bad for her. and if it is, well then, really, she could always tell him to stop - whether he would or not is a whole other issue.
We did run into a little of that over here years back... When it was decided that I was the one doign allllll the shopping, there were some snags here and there and sometimes he couldnt' find anything around the house that he wanted to eat and I was completely not organized and didnt' care to ask him before shopping. Now I'm all like... you know what days I tend to go shopping, you know where the list is, and there is a mini mart near the bus station and you work downtown... I think you can suss out what to do! Otherwise the grocery store is .75 miles away from the house.
DH tends to know what he wants pretty much always. I never know. I never fucking know. When he was the one at home and I was working full time, he'd shop for and cook these amazing meals, but didn't really shop for snacky stuff - just the stuff we needed for that day (which was actually cool, DS was a toddler at the time and we lived a block away from a decent veggie stand, they would pick a recipe and go buy the stuff every day).
I never know what I want. When I get hungry, I'll poke around and if nothing jumps out at me, I'll get a little sad and slink away... Then I get more hungry. And then I'm cranky that nothing is there and the whole world hates me and the whole world just fucking sucks while I'm sucking on stale, generic brand apple jacks because everything else is just too complicated. An orange is too big of a commitment. It's not like you can take two bites and put it back. Slicing cheese? Eh. The knife, the cutting board, the plate. WRAPPING the opened cheese... Remind me why the world hates me so much? All that shit needs to be washed and why can't I just have a little snack? Sob. DH isn't like this, thank fucking gawd. I might kill someone who pulled this shit on me. Even though I do it. lol When I get hungry and we're not on the schedule, the menu that I planned out and shopped for; I tend to insist that he choose what we eat; weekend lunches, dinners out when we have a sitter. I'll choose what I want off the menu, but there's this weird disconnect when I'm actually hungry - I cannot make a choice and if it's just for me every thing seems like too much effort, too big a commitment. If two of us want it, the drive to the local pho place isn't a bad idea,
LOL! I am just like that when I get hungry! You explained my mentality in those moments perfectly. In general, I hate deciding what to eat or make. And if I make dinner, its always something ta' do with pasta, cuz' it is easy. I used to be a more involved cook, and I'm sure one day I'll go back to loving the kitchen, but right now, gah - I'll eat what-ever is easy or what-ever Hal makes. It's like my brain is just not interested in food, even though my taste buds still enjoy it all the same. I feel like preparing food is such an annoying necessity right now. sad, i know, but that's where i'm at with food prep right now.
and i whine like a mother fucker in the morning if we don't have coffee, or hal hasn't made it. he lets me whine by not taking me seriously and understanding that i'm just miserable first thing in the morning. so, if he whines for something ever-now-and-then (eh-hem - usually sex) i don't fault him for it. neither one of us are "whiners" as the norm so not really an issue. so no need for a militant anti-whine stance in our house. that would cause more disruption than just letting the other person have their idiosyncrasy and keep it moving.
if it were you doing the whining or nagging about whatever, and your husband responded by cursing at you or responded in some otherwise nasty manner...how would you feel? How would that solve the issue or improve your communication or relationship in any way?
personally I'm incapable of loving and living in that style of communication. Whining is something I dislike also, but there have been times I've done it to my husband and times he's done it to me. We've chosen to help deflect this in each other by responding in a nice way. It works for us
p.s I'm also curious about what you mean by 'tone'...I read over the pro-nice, pro-snack fixing responses again carefully and I truly see us merely sharing what works for us, in our relationships and households. Isn't that what we are all doing here, sharing what works for us?
"if it were you doing the whining or nagging about whatever, and your husband responded by cursing at you or responded in some otherwise nasty manner...how would you feel? How would that solve the issue or improve your communication or relationship in any way?"
This question implies that whining and nagging takes place in our household, and it simply does not. Not because we are some saint couple who has a perfect relationship, but when it comes to the nagging thing, it's just not our style. I've never felt the need to do it, and honestly, my guy just doesn't really give me too much reason. He's an adult, and he takes care of himself in that way and acts as such. He just doesn't need me to nag at him, and vice versa. We're pretty chill people, so things just don't get under our skin the same way it might others. So it may not be that he doesn't do things that are nag worthy, it just doesn't bother me as much as it would someone else.
Also, the whole cursing thing. You assume that cursing is a mean, nasty thing to everyone. And it's not. We don't treat curse words as if they hold so much more meaning than other words. We both cuss like sailors around here, they are part of our everyday vocabulary. So if DH told me to go get my own damn cookies, I'd probably laugh at him, and then he'd go get me some cookies. Cause he's nice like that.
If you read over what I wrote, you will see that I placed zero value judgment on cursing (the italics were to make the word stand out). I merely asked you how being cursed at would make you feel, and also how would it improve the situation or your communication in any way. Since neither of you has ever nagged or whined at the other and this is unlikely to ever happen in your relationship, I guess the question is moot. However you said that if this did occurr that your partner cursed at you in this context, you would laugh. thanks for answering that question!
Still curious what you meant by 'tone' though, would you please answer that? None of us who wrote about making/preparing/buying snacks for our husbands and/or being nice to them said or implied that anyone else should do the same for their husbands. We were merely talking about what we do. I'm puzzled why you resent that or take it as a tone which indicts you or something. If you feel it does, would you explain how?
I truly am unable to see it...I take your feelings about the husband snack-making issue as something you choose to feel and do in your relationship, not as some big judgment on me and my marriage...because at the end of the day, even if it is a judgment, it's just your opinion and has zero effect on what I do, right? So I take it that you are merely sharing what works for you and why. That's what we are all doing here, we on the husband-snack-making front (LOL!) answering briefcandle's question and sharing what works for us and why. So I'm confused as to why you would resent me or anyone else talking about how we interact with our partners in ways that work for us.
this is such an issue for me, personally, on this site and in writing in general. i am always leery in posting my opinions or what works in my house for real concern that someone will take it personally. that someone will take what i do as a slight against what they do because they do differently. kwim? i hate that and don't understand that feeling too much. i don't understand how what works for me and mine is in any way a critique or criticism against someone who chooses differently. when i get the feeling i'm being criticized in this way, i have to step back and ask myself, 'how does what they are saying have anything to do with the life i live?' and 'why am i feeling so insulted by it?' or moreso, 'why do i care if she does it differently?' i'm not saying that this is what is going on with blu, but this is what i thought of as a response to what you wrote, merc.
and now we are really way off topic! and not even sure if it is productive at this point.
I think any time I learn something productivity has occurred. Communication is a big fascination of mine, particularly I'm strongly interested in learning how to clearly express what I mean and also my intentions.
is this conversation productive? maybe not, it might derail into something like this:
http://hipmama.com/node/39462#comment-296768
but maybe bleu will answer to let us know why she resented our viewpoint. in that case it will be productive for me because it helps me to know why someone would take my words in a different way than I intended. Like maybe I could have phrased something differently or whatever.
and yah, this tends to happen frequently on hipmama and other online communities, message boards, etc., it's one of the reasons I took a break a while back. I now try to keep out of such interactions by sticking to the topic/just answering the question, and/or not posting in response to topics or comments I disagree with or would perhaps take personally. Sometimes, though, curiosity gets the best of me, in particular when someone takes my words or even just my viewpoint about my life/relationship/situation/what-have-you as somehow pertaining to them.
Just wanted to add a bit more.
I was thinking why I even added my first initial post here anyways. And I thought, just like in real life conversation, different people pick up and are interested by different things. Some mamas on here heard "Hey, what are some good snack ideas for hubby?". Some of us heard, "My hubby is bitching at me cause I don't buy/make the right snacks!". So, we responded to different things. By us responding to her post differently doesn't make us feel slighted by what goes on in your house, see?
And just to reiterate, my post about tone was directed specifically at Dahlia's post, not at the general idea of making your husband a snack. I never took your words as pertaining to me, just wanted to clear that up. That's why I didn't respond to your posts on the topic. So I'm kinda puzzled why you are taking what I wrote in response to Dahlia's post as if it was directed at you. I suppose because you hold the same viewpoint as she does. But like I said, I was responding specifically to her words, not the idea behind them. I felt she was implying (again with the implication, one of the biggest problems with communicating online) that those of us who said for him to fix his own snack were not nice in general to their loved ones. I'm sure that's not what she was really saying (maybe she was, I don't know), but that's what I read, and that's what I was responding to. Just wanted to make that clear.
yah, I did think you were talking about all of us on the thread, me included, who talked about doing making snacks and/or doing nice things for our husbands, and it just wasn't clear to me at all why you or anyone else would resent that as we were specifically talking about our relationships. but I see from your other post that you were responding to a tone you thought was in dahlia's post.
I was initially puzzled about the anti-snack making posts...like fine, good for you if you don't/won't make snacks for your partner, but why jump bad at someone who does??? All she's asking for is snack ideas, if you don't have any, why respond at all? Why post ridiculing/putting down/what-have-you this aspect of her relationship? So reading what exactly you were responding to with that is illuminating. I did see the whining stuff, but did not take it as a problem or issue she was addressing...the post is asking for snack ideas for her husband, not how to get her husband to stop whining about snacks or how to get her husband to make his own snacks. Maybe in her household she is the main cook and food prep person.
and you're right, I think also that people do tend to pick up on what they're interested in. I'm very domestic and enjoy taking care of my house and husband, and consider very much the kitchen, food stuff, food prep to be my domain. I bake, cook mostly from scratch, can food, old-school traditional stuff like that. So the snack issue is right up my alley, you know? and what I responded to.
Yeah, and the bitchy husband thing is right up my alley.
Heh, just kidding. Nah, I'm just a dry, sarcastic, cynical type of person, and the classic whiney hubby/nagging wife thing just sticks in my craw. So I just picked on the whining husband thing as being a drag.
Which of course leads me to say I have no clue if that's how it is for Briefcandle. Just saying that's how I would handle it for me. Anyways, I think we more than understand each other now. It's all good.
that's hysterical 
you feel me, I feel you, coolness!
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that just gave me an idea... premade appetizers on toothpicks:
a cube of cheese & some kind of sausage (even beef jerky, heh).
a cube of cheese, sausage, and green apple with a raspberry chipotle dollop.