Pushing a wheelbarrow full of rocks up a hill.

I am working on Ethan's lyme disease and food allergies. His doc and other docs theorize that the health issues and food allergies stress little bodies and brains out and make them act out behaviorally.

So far on a gluten, casein, soy, corn and preservative free diet, Ethan's behavior seems to be improving. He seems calmer, much more focused, more easy going, more flexible etc. His speech is much clearer and more coherent on the diet. He used to string 2-5 sentences together that had nothing to do with eachother. IE: Mom! I like my bike. Can we go to school tommorrow? where's my car? What's that? Mom! MOm! I want to see Santa.

On the diet they seem to be more like: Mom! At school we're reading The Big Bad Wolf. And the big bad wolf is mean and scary. I don't like the big bad wolf.

I work with a counselor on behavioral issues that crop up with kids with special needs. We've been working a lot on me creating more routine and structure, which was a HUGE problem while I was dealing with the worst part of lyme disease. I developed wicked ADD and couldn't even focus enought to make a pot of coffee because I got the steps mixed up/distracted. I would put water in the pot, but forget to pour it into the machine. Grind the coffee beans and put them in a filter but forget to put them into the coffee machine. I would come back ten minutes later like where is the coffee? Do another step and then still not understand ten minutes later why there was no coffee when I hadn't turned the machine on or put the water in. I went from being able to clean the house in less than an hour- Throw a load of laundry in, throw the dishes in the dishwasher, declutter and clean while I waited for the dishes and laundry. During the worst of lyme/ADD I couldn't even clean my house, I would spend hours frustrated and extrememly confused and finally give up. I forgot to turn the washer on, got distracted, forgot to put detergent in etc.

Now that I'm much better cognitively, everything is so much easier. I can focus, read for hours, do a list of complicated things with multiple steps and complete them in a reasonable amount of time. I'm much more consistent with behavior etc.

The conflict now is between the counselor and I. She wants me to create even more structure and routine and I think we're good with what we've got. I'm focusing a lot of energy on reading about lyme and autism/ADHD treatments and how to treat the underlying medical issues. She wants me to focus more on the routine and day to day discipline. I feel like trying to improve Ethan's behavior with rewards systems and behavioral plans is somewhat of a waste of time right now. It's like trying to push a wheelbarrow full of heavy rocks up a hill. I want to approach the issue by tossing as many rocks out of the wheelbarrow as possible and then work on pushing the wheelbarrow up the hill.

I think in the end we're both right, that Ethan needs consistent routines, discipline, consequences and structure, but also that a lot of his behavioral issues will resolve as his brain isn't so inflamed.

At the worst of my lyme ADD/confusion, I tried making lists, reading up on ADD friendly organization etc. and tried extremely hard, but I still could not make coffee or clean my house. I basically gave up and did the best I could but mostly focused on getting the proper medical treatment/nutritional support to bring my body and brain back online.

Now that the treatement piece is over the hump, everything else is easily falling into place. I clean the house, remember appointments, stick to a better schedule and routine etc.

Any thoughts?