Doormat alert
For some reason I'm having trouble with this, and am coming to you wise mamas for help:
About a year ago I joined one of those career networking sites, in order to generate more $$$ for my business. I usually hate those things and am really leery about posting personal info online, but I figured it was business. Anyway, earlier this week I get an email from this creepy guy who had a crush on me in high school. He was two grades above me. I had to ride the late bus home every day after soccer practice (yecch) and he was always on it. He would hug me all the time and sit near me and hit on me. At the time I was too timid to tell him to fuck off. I was definitely not interested but it took him forever to get the hint, and I spent a good deal of time avoiding this guy. I think he meant well, just clueless.
So 20 years have gone by. I have a really unusual last name, and he must've looked me up. I live 3,000 miles away and am not planning to attend my HS reunion next year (though, apparently he is). He still lives in my hometown. Do I ignore him? Or do I write him a snippy email back, tell him I'm married, etc.? Why do I feel mean for not responding???
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DO NOT RESPOND TO HIM. Ever. I had a very similar situation happen to me with that site, Classmates. The dude who thought he could all of a sudden be my best friend (or something) finally stopped e-mailing me because I never responded to his e-mails. Its not mean. You are not interested in even the slightest interaction with him so it is actually the kinder way to handle this situation. You don't owe him anything and since he makes you uncomfortable, seriously, don't even engage with him. He'll survive.
That he'd like to see you? I think it's fine to respond with a brief 'this is what I'm up to', and it's fine not to reply at all. SO had a former gf get ahold of him online, obviously trying to reconnect or relive something--I had the sense that he was the one that got away for her and I felt bad for her and thought, why not let her think he has these fond memories too, but then she just kept emailing and he had to cold ignore her. ick.
just happened to me on facebook. don't sweat it. life is too short to feel beholden to people you don't need or want in your life anymore.
I've had a few people contact me that I would rather not have contacted me. I think it's a fabulous idea not to respond. It's not mean, it's self-preservative. I highly recommend the practice. 
"Do not forget. Remember and warn."
-- Plaque fixed to the hollow shell of Sarajevo's National Library
"Do not forget. Remember and warn."
-- Plaque fixed to the hollow shell of Sarajevo's National Library
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I think I needed to hear this from someone else. Back in school he always kind of guilted me into being nice to him, just because he was so persistent. Maybe it's that same creepy dynamic coming back to haunt me. Either way, I think I will just let it drop. You're right- he will survive.
"Too weird to live. Too rare to die." - Hunter S. Thompson