you are not alone. My oldest is 3 and she has been away from me over night one time when i was in the hospital having her sister last summer. we never even get to go out once every 4 months when my parents come to visit we get to go out for one night. we have no one to watch the girls but us. vacation hell i'd settle for a weekend. i feel ya ma no advice but you do not suffer alone.

Jessica
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind~~Dr.Seuss

Yes, I feel you. I dream about my "vacation" too. I think you are way over due if your guy is four. Geezus. Mine's 19 mos and I'm planning on one this summer hopefully. Atleast a weekend camping trip with a cooler full of beer. haha. My SO has had full weeks to himself too, but I haven't had but a hour here and a few hours there maybe.
I'm living in Connecticut right now and most of the time Ro's my only companion and I just want to rip my hair out. He's wonderful and he's slowly learning to play by himself for short bits, but he still needs me almost constantly. Finally, I started school and that has helped tremendously. I have something to think about! Awesome. Something besides my baby. I refuse to go to Le Leche League cuz I don't want to use my free time to talk about baby stuff even more.
good luck, sweety. I'm sure we all feel your pain.

"Religion is for people who are afraid of hell. Spirituality is for
people who've been to
hell."--quoted by Ken Bruen (Irish crime novelist)

there is serious tedium in parenting, and anyone who tells you different is full of shit. i remember having thoughts like this.... there are kids out there who are ill and need so much more hands on care, what am i complaining about? she's well, she's happy, she's smart and healthy... but still it's not intellectually stimulating. so, there it is.