First birthday ridiculous II

Now that i've had time to take myself out of it and not be so hypersensitive, i appreciate the thoughtful comments left on my last blog. This is a very sticky situation and I hope to handle it with grace, even if the rest of my family doesn't. I want this to be memorable for me, mostly. Sophie won't know what the hell is going on. I want to share the anniversary of her birth with all my loved ones. In coming years, I can change the rules and make it one party if I want because it'll be more about what Sophie will remember. I wouldn't ever try to stick her in a room that contains both my mother and father because thats a recipe for doom and disaster. They're in the thick of a highly nasty divorce and custody battle that I finally got old enough to walk away from. My dad and I have reconciled somewhat and I've forgiven him in my heart. It's taken so much work my part to get there. I'm proud myself for achieving peace where that's concerned because it was a long and difficult road.
The first party will be with my dad, my sisters, MIL, BIL2, and some "maybe" guests like my "step mom" who's going to give birth to my brother this month and SO's awesome aunt who might come with his mom. We invited the neighbors, but they're going to Denver that week so maybe we can have just a regular play date with them later. I nixed the pumpkin soup idea when SO suggested majedra! It's the most delicious, most versatile, cheapest dish to have at a party or anytime! I want to share the recipe for you all because I think it's awesome. I had it all the time as a kid because it's so fast, easy and nutritious.
For a bowl, put a scoop or so of rice, a scoop or so of cooked lentils, a small handfull of lettuce, some chopped tomato, cucumber and onion and sprinkle with garlic salt, pour on a few tbls. olive oil and some lemon juice and enjoy! I'm going to dress it up a bit for everyone by adding avocado and thinly sliced steak. Basically, I just set out all the ingredients buffet style and everyone grabs a plate or bowl and dishes up to their own tastes.
SO also came up with the idea to make the dry part of the cake batter for three cakes at once. Store it and just mix with milk or eggs or whatever and bake when I need to. One of the party activities will be to help decorate the cake! For Hors Dourves i'll just put out some salt and pepper potato chips and tortilla chips with corn and chile salsa from TJ's. Omg it's so good.
I'm so very looking forward to it.
With my mom, i'm going to her place for a visit anyway. We're going to kind of combine her birthday and sophie's because they're close. We'll have it quietly with just me, sophie, my mom and my brother at her house. We're going to go to the zoo or something, too. My mom isn't that big on parties anyway so a little celebration is right up both our allies. We'll just cook dinner with her at home all together or go to our favorite Cambodian food joint, Chez Sovan.
SO and I are also going to integrate a birthday party with our close friends with a fancy-dress thanksgiving cocktail dinner we had planned forever ago. I was already going to cook a huge thanksgiving dinner for us and a few handfuls of guests. Serve booze and party in our best clothes. We'll do the birthday cake and candles and presents with everyone before she goes to bed and after we'll celebrate being thankful for everything we have including making it through this difficult first year and have a wonderful time with our friends.
So it's not too bad, I'm all excited about everything now. I planned it all last night after I had a couple iced coffees. Buzz buzz buzz!