Yo Mama Says The Parental is Political
[Producer's note: we first published this way back in the late 90's.... no, come to think of it, it only seems that old, actually maybe it was the early oughts. Anyway, seems like a good moment in time to republish it... --S]

So you’re tired of politicians who never listen, administrations that ignore public opinion? Well, if Yo Mama were president, she’d revolutionize government from top to bottom. What’s her platform? It isn’t her platform: it is YOUR platform:

1. Unity: don’t let anyone monkey-wrench your revolution. Beware of danger from without and within; stand with your sisters; take care of each other.

2. Money, Food, Shelter, Daycare, Healthcare: Basic Human Rights. All children everywhere should have food, a place to sleep, safety from violence, and access to medicine. No exceptions, no excuses.

3. Equality and Respect: Everywhere, all the time.

4. Education: Free, high-quality basic education for every child in every neighborhood. Music and art lessons for all, safe schools, well-paid teachers, and free public higher education.

5. Real Democracy: We have a good system with bad managers. Vote. Run for office. Go to school meetings. Stage a protest. If you talk to your neighbors you will find there are more people on the side of Democracy than Tyranny. Identify common goals, build coalitions, create community, exercise your rights. Speak out.

6. Demilitarization and Decriminalization: Prevention before aggression. Feed the poor, heal the sick, render aid, and in matters of sex and religion, mind your own business.

7. Human and Environmental Justice: Humans need clean air and water. Pay attention to the lessons of the past to avoid devastation in the present.

Wondering how she’ll accomplish all this? Then you’re being too damn practical. Yo Mama has something no other politician can lay claim to: a functioning brain and a magic wand. Read her hips: She’s from a place called Reality; she’ll end patriarchy as we know it, offer tax breaks to all radical fringe activists, and guarantee a tasty tofu stir-fry in every pot.

Yo Mama is here, there, and everywhere, tending her kids and fomenting her maternal feminist revolution.