What I didn't say
was that the University of Portland Fucking School of Nursing
did not recognize me as I had hoped for the Psychiatric/Mental Health Nursing award this year. And my ego is bruised. And I am a little on the bitter side (and maybe the paranoid side)because I am partially just sure it is because of the fact that they know that I had to take a leave due to my bipolar diagnosis. That my ease and grace with the mentally ill is because I belong. There goes my ego again.
ps- I am the *only* person in my class asking for a placement in Psych/mental health after graduation and the only person planning to persue a PMH NP graduate degree.
bitter bitter bitter.
oh well recognition by a bunch of academics won't make me a better clinician.
"I don’t have to keep up some great pretention I’m the most dignified, eloquent, elegant, perfect, smart-thinking, kind, generous person. I’m just a plain old human with a whole bunch of flaws.”-- Lily Tomlin
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I'm sorry. I know you have been working so hard. Remember that the work you do and will do is just as important with or without their recognition. It's probably just politics.
But the only good thing I ever did at U of P was attend a totallly out of control pixies/ primus/ Jane's addiction concert. Most everything else I have ever done there seemed so damn uptight. I never even considered going there ( and I went to St. Mary's!) for college because the vibe was so restrictive. I know they have a good nursing program, and I know you have probably been working your ass of and despite their snittyness, you will forever remain Jubas: dignified, eloquent, elegant, perfect, smart-thinking, kind and generous queen of the world to all of us.
I went to the one in Moraga, CA.
what do they really know anyway. you've got the passion. you deserve the recognition.
"Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops." Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse Five. RIP, old man.
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Yup politics and sucking ass. I need to get back to humility. The only reason I wanted that award so badly was because I keep getting told by the same academics that I'll never get into graduate school with a meager 3.10 GPA.
"I don’t have to keep up some great pretention I’m the most dignified, eloquent, elegant, perfect, smart-thinking, kind, generous person. I’m just a plain old human with a whole bunch of flaws.”-- Lily Tomlin