Parent-teacher conferences
We had parent-teacher conferences last night. I like my sons' teacher, he likes her, he likes being in school this year (which is a first), everything is good.
Background info: My son was tested with a high IQ, but his grades have always been not that great (he's in 4th grade). He doesn't turn things in on time, and sometimes not at all. He has always had horrible handwriting and is not good at spelling.
Last night the teacher told me that the school is doing a new program where the standardized tests are now being taken entirely on the computer. She showed me his scores, and it was not what I expected. He tested very, very high in every subject. Way beyond grade level. So, we discussed it, and the deal seems to be that he just has such trouble with actual writing things on paper, that he just doesn't do it. He's smart, he knows the material, but he can't seem to transfer what is in his head out through his hand and onto paper.
He has no trouble on the computer, and is advancing very quickly in typing. All the teacher had to offer is that that's his learning style and it's OK.
But for him, really it's not OK. He gets SO frustrated. He will sit while doing homework and erase and erase trying to get a word right and usually it ends with him in tears. His teacher said that he did cry in class once for that reason.
I would like to try to help him with his putting things on paper skills, but I don't even know how to start. I think it's something he needs to learn, he can't go through life just using a computer.
Do any of you know if this is a specific kind of "learning style"? Is it something I should be able to ask the school for extra help with? Do any of you have kids like this? Or any teachers that have ideas?
Thanks!
We've tried writing in cursive, to make it more interesting; using a finger grip on the pencil helps, but mostly tailoring his assignments to stress quality over length. For ds it's a small motor skills difficulty with boredom--he has such a creative and articulate mind and taking the time to write it out takes too long. I get it.
One thing we've started recently is writing notes for each other. It's fun.
both mr sauce and my sister have this same problem. mr sauce was diagnosed as having a fine motorskill delay. I'll ask them about it tonight and get back to you.
* I blame men *
* I'm all fight and no flight *
It's kinda like dyslexia and my dh and my dad both have/had it. My dad dictated all his college papers to my mom and she typed them for him. He couldn't even get the thoughts out with a keyboard. DH outgrew his sometime in his 20's.
And yes, you can ask the school for testing and assistance with this, but why? If he can type, he'll be doing that a lot longer than he will be writing with a pencil.
And the teacher was talking about journaling with her kids. She showed us a bunch of the journals that they had used. Words were mispelled all over the place. But that didn't matter. The kids were allowed to write the words however they wanted to write them...the idea was not to get the word spelled "correctly", but to spell the word how it sounded. English is a shitty language like that. If your babe was learning Spanish, or something that was spelled like it sounded, it would be a whole different ballgame.
So, I dunno...but I would recommend having a talk with him about the real unseriousness of this matter. Words are the most unserious things he will ever encounter, so who cares if he spells them wrong. If you take the pressure off, he won't have such a hard time. It seems like he's really invested in getting this stuff right, because he feels a lot of pressure, and maybe he is longing for some kind of approval. To me, that means take off the pressure, and give him approval even if he spells the damned word wrong. Seriously, I spell words wrong all the time!!
Can you talk to his teacher, and do something to take the pressure off of spelling? I mean, have you seen that movie about the spelling bee? Those kids can spell, but they kind of suck socially, and in lots of other ways. Your kid is too smart. Sometimes it's hard to figure out the arbitrary rules of the lower minds...like when the i goes before the e, or whatever.
"The Universe Molds Itself To Prove Your Beliefs"
"Fundamentally the markswoman aims at herself" DT Suzuki
did I spell that right?
most 4th graders haven't had much practice with their handwriting simply because they aren't very old!
Give him some time on this, and keep encouraging him to write- anything, notes, journal, letters, lists.
It is a hightech world now, but handwriting is still a neccesary skill, and I beleive it has something to do with individuality that computers can't develop.
I was homeschooled as a kid and wrote to alot of penpals (some of whom were much older than me and had atrocious handwriting and spelling).
Thats awesome that he is soo high IQ and I totally could see how he could get bored with writing.
*bliss*
I don't have answers to your questions, but I do remember that Tony's dad had really bad handwriting up til he was in his 20s, and now, for some reason, it's much neater. This happens I guess.
Could you get the teacher's permission for him to type his homework? It seems like that would reach a balance of doing written schoolwork to learn to deal with it, but also being allowed to do things in his own style.
It sounds like you guys are in a really good position in that despite this problem, he's a great learner! Go him!
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"fine motorskill delay" OK yay! Just knowing what to call it will be a big help. Now I can do a little searching. I'd love to know what your sister and Mr Sauce have to say.