ready to scream (long)

ok this is going to be a long one, but i need to get it out and i have no one else to vent to currently, so here goes... let's start with the holiday week. it was the longest most painful week i have had in a long time! it started with an 8 hour drive that turned into a 10 hour drive. we left our house at 4:30 in the afternoon and arrived at my parents at 2 in the morning. dh was there until mon. afternoon then he had to drive back to pick up the dogs at the kennel and be at work on tues. my grandmother was at my aunt's house and not coming home until the 28th. so dd and i stayed (w/ no car) until the 1st so we could see her. my mother criticized every drop of motrin i gave dd, took her pacifier away whenever she felt dd did not need it, took her from me when ever she wanted, and feed her ice cream and let her lick sugar off her pastries. (dd is 10 months and has never had that type of sugary food before) my sister picked fights with me just to pick fights. she did childish things like tell me that she bought the cake and she would eat 3 pieces even if i had not had 1, if she wanted. dd has her own crib there, but no changing area, or infant tub. so i would often ask my mother for her getting her dressed (she was often laying on the couch in there sitting room, w/ my changing supplies spread through out the room.) several times my sister (who has no children) made sarcastic comments about "wow it really must take a village" and "how does she do this at home". most of which, i let go , but on occasion when i would fight back my mother would lecture me on how we needed a peaceful holiday, and how i just needed a nap. this from the same women who 6 months ago told me that my sister was "a selfish bitch, and she did not care if she never spoke to her again." (yes that is an exact quote.) meanwhile, dd, who usually sleeps a 12 hour night through, did not sleep more then 8 hours the whole 9 nights we were gone. most nights we were luck to get 5 hours out of her. she was tired and cranky. then thur. she gets an upset belly and spikes a fever. the same day my grandmother (who my mother is not thrilled about have to take care of) has an accident in the bathroom that my mother then has to clean up. at home dh has taken a whole day off work because on of the dogs got sick from the stress of kenneling, but he manages to go out for drinks several times while we are gone. then he calls me on thur or fri and tells me that his mother wants us to fly down and visit her in fl for martin luther king day. (which is only about 2 weeks away) he really wants to go and he thinks he will take extra time off so we can stay for 5 days or so. now his mother and i don't get along and 2 days with her feels like forever to me. plus i was not really in a great frame of mind to receive this info. in addition dh and i have been looking into moving back up north so i could be closer to some family (i have more then my parents there) and have some help with dd. we don't like where we live (the city or the development.) he hasn't liked his job and his schedule plus the commute leaves very little family time. it has been really hard for me because we don't have a lot of close friends here so i don't have much help w/ dd. but his office has now moved and his commute is still 45 mins. but there is no traffic. also while i was gone his friend, who has a more sr. position then dh, told him that he wants him to come work in his dept. and he thins that in the next year or so dh could get promoted. no dh wants to stay. i was trying to come to terms with this. but tue. i started getting what dd had been sick with and i called dh to see if he could leave early that day. he, of course, said no. but he would take today off. then he sent me a message saying that he forgot he had an interview to do today. so he will need to go in for the morning. now he says that he might take tomorrow instead, because then he can take a whole day. i'm like screw it the head ache and stomach thing is gone now. (keep in mind the dog got sick last week and he took the whole day off to take care of her. all i wanted was 2 freaking hours on tues! plus, now he is happier so he wants to stay, but he is still gone just as much, i still have no help, and when i call him for help he says he can't he has too much going on that day. i am so annoyed and i don't even know if this long ramble made any sense, but the long and the short of it is i am hating life right now, and i am fed up with my family and dh! thanks for letting me vent this! i gotta go make lunch now. no rest for the weary momma, ya know!