I should be attending my cousinâ€™s wedding shower today, but because of a â€œleave your kids at homeâ€? request, I opted to spend the day with my babies instead of extended family. Iâ€™m not sure if I was trying to make a silent statement about so-called family functions by not attending, or whether I honestly thought finding a sitter to look after three under the age of three was doable.
At the last minute, I was informed babies were allowed â€“ meaning my littlest man Curtis of six months could tag along, but not my two or three-olds. Maybe itâ€™s the mama in me that wasnâ€™t swayed by the â€œinfants only exceptionâ€? rule. I guess in my own twisted mind I believe family events should be just that; after all, we have never excluded the tiniest family members from anniversaries, birthdays or simple BBQs. In my Guyanese family our motto is "the louder, the better".
But, who am I to pass judgment on my cousinâ€™s wedding celebrations? After all, I was there seven years ago, and I went through the trials and tribulations of planning a wedding while trying to appease all sides. But, always the analyst, I thought about the future, and the questions that may or may not be asked by my childrenâ€¦you know, like â€œHow come you were there but we werenâ€™t?â€? And while the adult answer is simple and easy to understand â€“ some people choose to have adult-only weddings, it may not seem that way to my kids. â€œAunt R didnâ€™t want us there because they were afraid weâ€™d sneak vodka into our baby bottles thus slapping her with a $3000 fine, or maybe two-year-old Christopher would make off with the money box (mom would have shoe money!) or worse, someone would do leaps and bounds into the wedding cake.â€? OK far-fetched and over-the-top scenerios. Shame on me. But, I know the real reason is because kids are loud and unpredictable, they may say something inappropriate, do something embarrassing or leave a lasting unwelcome memory on that sacred wedding video. Chances of that happening are just as good for their parentsâ€¦the adults.