hard to be alone. oh wait I'm not

llladynasti's picture

Spent the holidays with my little girl, it was us against the world (and all the extended family drama). It was restful and delicious. Lots of walks (it is so not cold yet), games, snuggling, even swimming and dancing and a good book she'd brought home from her school library. We had such a great new years eve -it was the first year we went downtown. Where we live now (it's been almost a year since we left my parents' home) is right along a bus route so we took the free bus and the only money we spent was on some authentic tacos for our dinner from a vendor down there. It was awesome - they had all kinds of art (from the gymnasts hanging from the roof above our heads to the art gallery set up all around us, the kids were making masks and hula hooping, and there was one stage in city hall across the ice rink and another on the street. We managed to get down to the wild front of the stage just in time for the countdown and then turn around and look up to see the fireworks. It was really sweet and the energy was awesome.
Less than an hour ago, her dad picked her up for his week with her. As they walked out the door I immediately felt deflated, and actually considered crawling into bed until tomorrow (it's 3PM). She was at my mom's overnight a couple nights ago and I had rented a nice little movie on iTunes, so now I ran to see if it was expired because I wouldn't mind watching it again! Sadly, it was expired, but THIS MANIC MAMA started downloading a few new episodes. Thus (and with so much gratitude), the sanity to move on with my life and just deal with those issues which seem scary when I'm all alone. Good to know I'm not alone!
I'm already getting a little bit quicker at remembering I'm not alone (with help!).


Bee's picture
Submitted by Bee on

Ah, that sounds like a really nice time!!

I completely sympathize with the lonely feeling when the kid is away. It can hit even when they are with us full time... a couple of years ago my son was with his grandparents before the holidays and a storm kept him from coming home - it was the most wretched thing. I still want to cry when I think about it, and I'm not very attached to holidays, and also never cry. Winter is just hard enough without any additional woes.