Fact-checking my crazy ex...

caffeine jones's picture

J) ...is NOT what this blog is for,
but since he has time to post lies all day, and I'm busy with his kids and my homework...
Well, I guess I ought to keep the record straight, somehow.
Here is a rare example of someone correcting Dingo's insane stories:

From facebook:
Dingo Dizmal
I love how long this trip has been! David it was YOU who inspired me to move to Ptown and become a clown waaaay back 1997 or so.
Yesterday at 1:17pm

David Lichtenstein
I inspired you to ---? Wait, really! I think I was one of the first local Portland performers to meet you here and teach you lasso, but you already had your crazy clownarchy self going on. And you were here.
Yesterday at 3:01pm

Dingo Dizmal
WAAAAAYWAAAAY back before I lived here I caught your show. We hung out in the parking lot as you told me about your life. As soon as we got home to Eugene I started selling our possessions and making plans to move to Beverly.,..hills that is...When you were teaching me lasso I told you about yourself not realizing that I was talking to the guy I was talking about. Remember I knew you as Dave and then found out you were Leapin Louie.

Dingo's response is BS. We never caught a show up here before we moved here. And Dingo never wanted to move to Portland.
For the record: What REALLY happened:
I, myself, got sick of the Eugene scene, and decided to move home to Portland. Dingo followed me, and then spent the next four years repeating some tired and angry lines about how Portland was a “God-forsaken hellhole” and he couldn't believe I dragged him here. He met some other clowns, like Louie and Extremo, and said that they were losers, pretending to be happy on the outside, just like everyone in this crappy town I was making him live in. He gestured to the freeway and told me he'd soon be gone. I told him please do.
It was Eric Bang who insisted we move to Alberta. I feared over-exposure, but it turned out that constant attention was like a balm to Dingo's wounded soul. He redoubled his efforts at being a “good” person, to make people like him. He even quit drinking! He began to appreciate Louie, and Extremo, and all his friends, who helped and supported him.
Then he cried all over his blog about the Clownhouse closing, collected hundreds of dollars from well-wishers, for “us,” kept the money, and stuck me with over $1,000 in bills, which nearly doubled when all the fees were added (I was unemployed for awhile, and he denied the existence of the bills when I asked him to help, so it all went to collections.).
This exchange between Louie and Dingo on facebook is one the few times I can recall, besides the time when Eric Bang backed me up and told him he had a drinking problem, that anyone has corrected Dingo directly. I actually believed for a long time that people would set him straight, so it wouldn't always be me, and this public accountability would help him be the “good” person he was trying to be. Guess he didn't want to be a good person, after all. Boy, was I fooled. When Will started challenging the untruths on his blog, Dingo changed the settings, so no one can post to refute him.
Wasn't I a sucker? All my trying to have faith in him did was enable him! I knew I was done, the day I admonished him not to lie in order to get his way, and he looked at me with rage in his eyes and said, “I'm sick and tired of having to be ETHICAL all the time!”
Turns out, all that time he was being ethical, it was just to impress me. He said everyone's against him, so he might as well do and say whatever he wants. What a slap in the face of all his supporters.

Comments

sunflower's picture
Submitted by sunflower on

That can be really difficult. My ex was like that. He was a dog before he was with me, and tried really hard to be an ethical guy and to share my social justice values when we were together, but it wasn't something he internalized.

I hate it when people take a lie and run with it, like Dingo did. People sometimes would rather believe what they wish was true than what really was the reality, because reality can make them look douche-y. I think lying, especially about things other people know about, makes you look more douche-y, and keeps you from learning from life experiences, but hey, what do I know?

Sunflower the unflower

Mom's Tinfoil Hat
Foodie loves Picky

guava's picture
Submitted by guava on

a pathological liar. He is such a good liar that he convinces himself, then gets all indignant/emotional when you call him out. I ran into him at a party after I hadn't seen him in seven years, and he was drunk and cornered me with these tearful accusations that I had done x,y,z to him -- when those were things he had done to me!

Journals are good for these kinds of people. Not for them, but for you. So you can go back and read what was actually going on, and remind yourself that you don't live in an alternate universe.