Bee's picture
Wed, 02/02/2011 - 21:00 -- Bee

Memo: I came here in search of GOOD weather. Not historic cold snaps!

Snow storms? Rolling blackouts? Stranded in the desolate ruins of downtown Houston?

No problem, because I discovered a secret portal to another world.

Looking for un-sexy, anti-fun, dystopian design? The Houston Tunnels have it all!

And, although the major freeways are shut, the office workers all tucked away safe at home, the city practically in a state of emergency and otherwise closed (including NASA), the Tunnels are open. Empty, except for the minimum wage workers selling unwanted sandwiches. . . but open.

Since I have literally nothing to do and nowhere to go I have spent a great deal of time in the breakfast room of the hotel.

European hotels a "continental" breakfast (and remember, the key word "continent" refers to Europe) consists of yogurt, cereal, and sometimes bits of sliced meat and cheese depending on the region. With excellent coffee.

In England, the hotel breakfast is typically a "Full English." That means scrambled eggs, fried tomato, bacon, blood pudding, mushrooms, with baked beans. Served up with coffee or tea, though tea is the safest option.

In Texas (and since Texas acts like an autonomous nation, we will grant that status for the purposes of breakfast comparisons) I have been offered fried eggs, hash browns, grits, biscuits, gravy. No yogurt, no plain toast, and also, while tea is on the menu they've always just run out.

I've gone to extreme lengths to find my morning coffee fix and spend a lot of time every day giving cafe directions to desperate fellow visitors.

If you were to choose national allegiance based on the breakfast I would have to pick Europe, and more specifically, the cold grey parts of Europe that subsist mainly on yogurt.

This isn't even a preference - I literally can't eat the rest of it. Before I lost my gallbladder I never had problems but now? Ouch. Two bites of the wrong food puts me out of service for the rest of the day.

Lunch and dinner are just as perilous, so basically I haven't been able to eat on this trip. Even stuff that looks safe has apparently been injected with grease.

In England I peck suspiciously at the eggs, but mostly stick to dry toast. I would starve if I had to make do with Texas style dining!


Food in England is bad, but rarely dangerous.