My Dad has parkinson since some years, and as it is not treatable, he is on a rollercoaster towards the end. I'll visit my parents next weekend and it might be the last time I'll see him alive. I'm not sure how I feel about all this. I'm a bit afraid of how might look. My Mom told me that he shrunk, that he got very thin and tiny. He sleeps almost all day, he cannot sit for longer than an hour. It's frightening how fast it went. In this last months his whole constitution crushed. And he developed a dementia within the last four, five weeks. He really travelled back in time, first into the time he was still at work, the next week he was back to WWII (he's over 80), than he thought my Mom was his own mother, was back in his childhood.
I'm sad. I'm confused. I'm afraid: afraid of loosing him, afraid of this going on much longer, afraid of becoming that way myself when I get old. I dont know what to do. I have to explain all that to my children (DSS is almost 11, he understands a lot, but DD is four and I do not know what she really understands).
Thanks for listening.
Well, it was a sad weekend. AND exhausting. My dad has become so small, if a doctor would have to give him something intamuscular he would have to search for a muscle. He's only skin and bones. His face is a numb mask. He cannot eat, so my mum gives him baby's food so he'll gat at least something. To be true he's starving, but at least he has no pain. He sleeping almost the whole day. I don't think he will make it to Christmas. My mom stopped giving almost all of his meds as they doesn't help him. The only thing he gets is an anti-depressive.
Interestingly enough, DD took it quite normal. Grandpa is sick and old, he will not get well again, and he will die. She is sad about it, but she wasn't afraid of his looks. So he could be delighted to see her.
