medstudentmama's blogLOve and stuffHey mamas, how are you? I have had one helluva week but my experiment finally worked!!! I had to rid myself of stress and tension and take it all very slow and really picture the ligation and annealing and it worked!! What a relief! 10 reasons why life is (still) peachy!
Xanadu!Hello Ladies! I am very chatty this weekend, I think posting twice in a couple of days is a first! But I just feel so good I thought I would spread it around! 10 things I like:
Life continues apacei am happy today, I just had an uber decadent breakfast of garlic ciabatta and bacon plus greek yoghurt and honey! i doubt the billionaires of this world ate any better, they probably have bee pollen or some such other shit in a misguided attempt to live forever! Sometimes I like a bit of bee pollen and want to live forever too but not today! 10 things I am grateful for today; all my best wishes to everyone!
hey!hello, hello! I woke up today feeling GOOOOD for the first time in a month and a half, I kindof didn't realise that I hadn't been feeling good until I felt good again. I wasn't insanely miserable, just a little out of whack BUT I am really proud of myself cause I didn't do anything insane, there is not a ton of mess to clear up,bills got payed,obligations fulfilled even at my worst I am doing pretty good! Some things that I am joyously grateful for today;
grats10 things I am grateful for today!
Thank you!Thank you so much to all of the mamas that reached out to me during my plagiarism crisis! i went to see my convener and basically laid it out, took responsibility and apologized. I was totally crying! She was amazed, she was like I know that this was unintentional this session is for your benefit and this issue ends now with no record of it, its a learning experience! It was more of a technical issue about a methods section and certain specific scientific language. My actual project supervisor had my back 1000%. So I learnt a good lesson, I was humbled at depth publicly and I gotta tell you it was good for my soul! see you later mamas keep on truckin
I am in the shithello mamas, I usually keep stuff positive in this blog but I am in the shit and I need to tell it. I got an e-mail today from the convenor of my course saying an assignment I had handed in had been flagged up as plaguairism. I called her and she confirmed that some of the quotes had been wrongly referenced and it constituted plaguirism. I was totally shocked. Its not THAT big a deal in one sense, I will get a 10% penalty however, there is another piece of work that if this work has come up as plaguerised , then it definetly will. I was so tired, stressed when I did it, ihave been looking at it and I have no idea what is mine, wether the references are correct. Infact I know that it is plaguarised, I can't believe that I didn't see it I was in a daze. I am so ashamed. I have been in med schoool for 5 years, a top student, no problems and now I have transferred to a new faculty for my masters and everything has gone to shit. I do not know what the consequences will be. I have been assured that the first one is not a big deal but the second one may change that. I am going to go in tommorrow and tell the truth and let the cards fall where they may. At this point my integrity is more important than my reputation. None of this was intentional or malicious, just stupid. I am a good person, I am a good doctor. This does not impact on my medical degree, which is safe but it may on my academic career, well I got to take it on the chin. I've noticed a few people have spoken about losing touch and giving up on academics and regrets. I am going to take strength from those posts and not give up. I am gonna do the hardest thing and live with my mistake. This seems so petty when compared with other peoples problems. I am still lucky, blessed and grateful. ijust learnt something about myself that I don't like but thats not the first time that that has happened and atleast now I can change it.
2010!!!Hello Ladies, Happy New Year! This is a little late but I have been under a deadline for the last two weeks. I have been reading though. I love this site, it kind of reminds me of a changing landscape or shoreline with all kinds of treasure washing up with the tide.Well anyway, 10 reasons that I grateful in 2010! Love from meds
Its all good!hello, hello I've enjoyed everyones posts so much over the holiday. Its so great to dip out of whatevers going on and dial into something else for a couple of minutes. Its very restorative. It has been snowy and icey here and so we have been hosebound, eating lots of great food and playing board games. A good holiday and time to think though KD has had a real chesty cough. I have basically allowed her to stay in , in Pjs not wash hair etc and I am determined to be rid of it before she goes back to school. 10 pre new year grats; Take the best possible care of yourselves!
Trapeze!Hello mamas, When I got to the studio it was actually static trapeze not flying as the instructor emphasises you aceiving safety and control through your own strength rather than just getting strapped onto stuff. We did a lot of warm ups, running and stretching and some ball games designed to wake up your brain. I was so excited i could not stop looking at the trapeze! Me and another new guy then worked with an instructor, the trapeze was about 5 feet up and you basically gripped on, alowed the trapeze to take your weight, engage a little upward lift in the shoulders then you used your abdominals to lift your legs up and catch the bar with your feet. You then boosted upwards until you were in "hocks" with the back of your knees bent over the bar, you let go with your hands and swing! Then you use your abdominals again to swing your body up and catch the ropes, "the velvets" with your hands. You straighten up and volia your seated!WE then progressed to some tricks, like standing!, the mermaid, the russian angel! I have to say it was amazing but exhausting, as the evning progressed it got harder and harder to get up there. I was also limited in choice of tricks I could do as my hands did not have sufficient grip strength and were just too soft! The rope just ran through them. MY palms were ruby red and boiling hot by the end of the session. Apparently seasoning your hand is something that happens over time. It is a compelling activity and addictive no matter how much it hurts you need to get up! Obviously though my hands and their sensitivity are extremly important too my job! I have been looking at gymnastic hand protectors and if I can make them work I will definitely continue,if not there is the option of doing silks work instead. I am going to give it a good try though! The trapeze is so unyielding, it looks friendly but it doesn't help you at all, all the power comes from you and if you hesitate it is punishing BUT the feeling of satisfaction when you find a new point of stability and security in such an alien environment is electrifying. It is also very motivating fitness wise as I woke up this morning thinking what can I do to today improve my trapeze! Bye ladies
geurilla christmashello mamas, - Hip mama, I love this community!
clean sheethello hip mamas, I feel a little inhibited blogging today as there have been several negative references to a comment I made on DCs blog. I kind of took the stance that i was not going to continue to talk about this mainly cause I didn't want to add to DCs load in any way but I can't just continue blogging without referencing it. Honesty and truth telling is what attracted me to this site and what gives it its power, a power I have definitely experienced! The comment I made that has caused so much to do quite clearly stated "in this context": by this I was referring directly to the background that Dc had described to this situation. I am not going to list specifics of someone elses life here however I was NOT making any kind of statement about pregancy, teen pregnancy or accidental pregnancy in general. I did not interpret this situation has an accident or a contraceptive failure. As for my diamonds down the toilet comment that has been described as harsh. Maybe you should know a bit about my situation, my sister gave birth at 17 in less than perfect circumstances, I was 19 and we were both living chaotically with no wider family support. Throughout my nieces life I have been there 110% to such an extent that I took over her full time care when she was 4. I am absolutely commited to my neice and provide for her in every respect. I would do what I have done for my niece a milllion times over and have no regrets BUT for a significant amount of time I invested a lot of energy in trying to prop up an unworkable situation, tried to pull along my sister and carry her when she had no interest or investment in changing. This is heart breaking, exhausting and, until someone wants to change, pointless. This stuff can make you crazy, literally. This is the great lesson of my life and whenever I get the chance to share it I do. My language in my comment was direct and visceral cause it was to DC. That is her approach she shoots from the hip and I love her for it. She gives out honesty, blood and guts and thats what she wants back. She was laying her experience out on the line and i responded in kind. My experience from the fontlines, not theory or rhetoric. maybe your experience has been different to mine thats great tell me about it! I don't mind being challenged at all. I read a few things about relative contributions or time served on this site. I am new but I honestly did not see this as at all relevant, I am certainly not new to the effects of teenage preganacy on the wider family and parenting! DC is a huge part of why I joined this community. I personally have got so much from her posts and her current situation breaks my heart. I greatly admire her honesty and fortitiude and unflagging energy. AS far as I am concerned my comment controversy is done and i will continue to reach out to Dc or anyone else where I feel like my experience could be useful
calm before the stormhello Hip mamas, I am sitting on my couch eating a contemplative tangerine and considering the work I have to get done over the next 4 weeks and particularly the stuff I need to do today and I am just overwhelmed with gratitude for the ability to be the architetct of my own fate. Gratitude list!
Naturally I won! Manifestation totally works!Hello Hip mamas, So what happened? "I present my paper with real style and class and I look fantastic; professional, chic and just a little bit sexy!" ( Well I don't know about a little bit but I got asked out by cab driver who had just completed a marathon run across the hills of snowdonia, fit is the word!) "I deliver my take home message with aplomb and my arguments are convincing and thought provoking. MY passion for and belief in my hypothesis shines through the entire experience" My supervisor actually used the word aplomb afterwards describing the whole thing! Coincidence? I think not! "MY language and diction are clear and my delivery is flawlessly smooth and fluid." The President of the society said at the end I have never seen anyone speak so fluidly in my life. I am named the winner and collect a cheque for five hundred pounds. I have a fantastic evening and all the bigwigs leave thinking, what a fantastic girl she will make a great surgeon one day!" I was named the winner and everyone did say this! In addition to this I had a little minor vision of twisting the night away with the head of surgery and this is exactly what happened! I feel so humbled by this whole experience and a little bit awestruck. I am so aware of the power of my thoughts, dreams and wishes and my words. It feels like an awesome responsibility as I am truly responsible for my whole experience in this world. I finish for the holidays on Friday and I am gonna do some reading around this issue. I am the architect of my fate and it feels damn good! I am so grateful to the universe!
Wishing on a star, working on myselfhello hip mamas, In two days I will be presenting at a National surgical conference. I will be discussing a paper that I wrote that I know has the power to save lives in my city. I want to write a peice about how this will go in order to manifest the experience and produce the right vibration before I settle down to my final preperation and I want to do this here, publically, in order to totally commit myself to bringing this about. so here goes! "I present my paper with real style and class and I look fantastic; professional, chic and just a little bit sexy! It is obvious from the start that my understanding has real depth and clarity, that I am completely familiar with and comfortable with the literature and that the paper shows a great deal of original thinking. My slides present my data clearly and attractively. I deliver my take home message with aplomb and my arguments are convincing and thought provoking. MY passion for and belief in my hypothesis shines through the entire experience. I convince everyone that there is something here that warrants further study. MY language and diction are clear and my delivery is flawlessly smooth and fluid. I handle questions from the floor easily with an innate intelligence and insight that impressess everyone. I am named the winner and collect a cheque for five hundred pounds. I have a fantastic evening and all the bigwigs leave thinking, what a fantastic girl she will make a great surgeon one day!" Well didn't I do well? I am so excited to have this opportunity especially now I know I'm gonna win!!
I'm OK Your OKHello Hip mamas, 1. Brains, I got some, I took em for granted, I kinda lost them for a spell, I gottem back! My neurons are well wired, I'm not boasting they just are and they won't last forever so ENJOY! 2. Taking a mental health day without feeling the need to offer labrynth excuses. 3. Spotify, the best free music site ever I am getting a classical music education and I am loving the ballet music and russian folk stuff too. The Nutcracker grand pas de deux makes my heart swell. 4. Roasted, salted cashew nuts. 5. Clean clothes, clean floors, clean windows, i deserve em and so do you 6. Microscopes I like em I always get a little thrill when things my eye is not desigened to see come into focus and I discern microarchitecture. Cells are crazy beautiful and make the most complicated manufactured object we have look like a Tonka toy. There is an elegant simplicity to their workings that we may never hope to emulate. I think its good we have some limits! 7. Yoga 8. My kid being named most promising ballet student of the year, being awarded a book token in school for academics, being put forward for her next ballet exam, helping me fold laundry, getting stroppy and then apologising, growing, growing in every way. 9. The sartorialist, I dress for comfort, speed and price is a REAL issue so I love looking at this site cause its real people looking super chic. I wanna reclaim my look but I am time and cash poor , plus slightly overpadded at the moment! 10. MIT opencourse ware if you or yours are interested in maths or science please look at this site I am doing the bio and chem course over christmas for fun cause I have 4 WEEKS OFF !!!!!! 2 WITH NO KID AT HOME!!!!!! 11. One more: Roman history I am reading a book about it and I am moved. I like the idea of a republic, I like their dedication to an ideal and self belief, I dislike their chauvanism and flinty eyed savagery. "perfer et obdura; dolor hic tibi proderit olim"
new stuffHello, I think I'm becoming a blog addict! I think its the thought of being so far away from everyone on this blog, its like putting a message in a bottle. I had to dish out some discipline tonight and it is a fraut issue. The area that I live in is a nice(ish) street in a bad wider area and my neice went to a part of the neighbourhood where she knew she was not allowed to go and straight up lied about the circumstances, saying that she was being supervised by a friends mother when she wasn't. The law was layed down and she will be apologising to the woman in question tommorow. The kids around here are not bad kids but they are unsupervised and as shes getting older the gap between what they are allowed to do and she is allowed to do is widening. Since she moved up to high school (that happens at 11 here) she has been out a lot less because of homework and also some extra dance rehersals and so there has been a change in the dynamic of her friendship group. A (childless) friend of mine thinks I'm being too hypervigilant. That maybe true. I wish she could just run wild in a safe environment forever infact I wish we all could! I am rediscovering Jilly Cooper she is a English author who writes in 70s/80s upper crust English milieur, lots of horses and dogs, in a kind of sexy blockbuster style which is at alternately hilarious, sweet and intensly arousing! Its all set in pre post modern times and drink driving, xenophobia and indiscriminate unprotected sex are relatively guilt free pursuits! I don't condone any of these activities but its impossibly glamourous and is helping me through the dark winter nights. I am geering up for a big Winter solstice/Christmas clean and polish. i want everything to shine and smell good. MY mop and I laugh in the face of 8 hours light a day. I spied some lovely adolescent holy in my local park. Do you guys have holly too? The baby stuff is soft and flexible and canary yellow and it darkens and stiffens as it matures. the teenagers are lovely and speckled. I am planning on cutting some and putting it round the house. Life is beautiful. I am grateful to be in the fight.
New stuff\hello, hello I was so thrilled with the replies I got to my blog! I commented back but I didn't know if its best to reply on my comments or that of the other person. I geuss I don't know the etiquette yet! After feeling so great after reaching out I felt a little resistance to coming back on. Isn't that strange? Well resistance to Hip Mama is futile so here is what is going on; This week I am... OVERWHELMED; I have a ton of reading to do for school BUT my kid is on half term SO i reprioritised, reduced expectations on myself and others and made a freaking list (lists are my religion) and factored in FUN in the form of museum trips, Fantastic MR Fox and a late night star gazing trip in a nearby wood. We did see Jupiter but then clouds obscured the view and we crunched home through the leaves singing christmas carols (early but fun). EXCITED and PROUD: My kid is participating in a Giselle workshop with English National Ballet this week and then watching the company perform the next day plus next week attends her pre professional classical ballet programme where the theme is Flamenco! This is not bad going for a couple of kids born into an area known locally as "rat alley". SOMETIMES in this world the cream does rise to the to the top! Also she got the results from some cognitive aptitude tests that she did in school that put her in the middle ( I would agree) BUT her first term performance in her subjects puts her in a lot of subjects right near the top of her class. That speaks volumes for her attitude and enjoyment and determination and (I think) her input from home! PISSED OFF: Came up against some family shit this week. There are a lot of people in my family who are fossilised in past trauma and pain like the fucking Piltdown man. They have developed a set of sterotypical responses to life designed to protect then from further pain and anguish but that unfortunately stunt their further development. Its a shame and difficult sometimes to keep me and mine on a healthy trajectory. i think its good for kids to see how it is for people, how to detach with love (the only true freedom) but its hard. GRATEFUL: I am grateful for everything I have. I DON'T take it for granted. I am grateful for this site. I don't feel so alone. I am grateful for the 25p copy of Polo by jilly Cooper that I bought last week from a market stall and the cereal I just ate and the clothes on my back.You guys are inspirational and I thank you. LOve form Liverpool 10 from LiverpoolI blogged for the first time today and i can't stop looking at it! Sad I know but its good to testify! Because of my situation (I have legal parental responsibility for my neice) I don't always have my mama status acknowledged and it feels good to own it. I'm not sure what format to do this in so I am gonna start with a gratitude list. Someone actually asked me to start one of these so I am and I'm putting it out for the whole world to see! 1. Porrige with golden syrup, i geuss most everyone else here is American and knows this stuff as oatmeal, Whatever you call it its still good! 2. Public transport. In Liverpool this is cheap and reliable though the odd brick is thrown through the window, my life would not work without it and am grateful to every narky bus driver in the world, my only criticism is to kill the pot smoke, I HATE it and it stinks up my blowdry. 3. People=Hope. I met someone today who came to my town as a kid as a refugee from the former Yugoslavia. terrible scenes, awful,awful. His family was invited by my goverment and he came, he settled he got on and over it. He triumphed! sometimes even goverments get things right (occasionaly) 4. The liverpool astronomy society; its putting on 2 nights of free talks and access to telescopes and food 2 minutes from my house during my kid's school holiday. 5. Purple sprouted brocolli reduced to 50 pence at the supermarket 6. Socialised medicine, don't believe the hype. I just booked a teeth cleaning for me and a check up for my niece for free. She also sees an orthodontist for free and gets skin stuff for dryskin for free. I hope and pray that the whole world one day gets to think about themselves rather than money when they get sick. 7. NOT having a car, your saving the planet, keeping your girlish figure and building bone mass all at the same time! Poverty chic! 8. Carly simon. I've never been a huge fan but I listened to let the river run on spotify today and cried. It made me wanna go to New York, I am actually scheming to get there next Summer on a medschool elective with my kid. 9. MY health, I'M STRONG, TOUGH I haven't had a cold yet this year and I don't intend getting one. I am investing in my body and rediscovering my old dancer self, it is in there somewhere! I am setting my alarm for 5 am and I am doing my yoga DVD. 10. My kid, I was 19 when I first started taking the reigns. Little did I know the journey that I would go on or the great person I would meet/help create. I wouldn't have "planned" it this way but growing up with a kid is great, you become ignited by love and all things are possible. THis kid has great humour, kindness, is loving and sweet, apreciative. She is beautiful and has a great gift for dance. She's tops! During the writing of this blog I did a load of laundry, washed dishes, made dinner for tomorrow, supervised the drawing of a still life, packed a school bag and ironed clothes for tomorrow. All in a days work,
Hellohello, I just joined this site but I have been a long time reader of these blogs and thought I would join in! I am a single parent to my 11 year old neice and have been since she was 4 years old. I couldn't believe it when I came across this site and read blogs that reflected my life experiences; cooking, cleaning, busing it,counting the last penny whilst trying to make stuff happen. This site has been a revelation to me as I don't have many people in my life that relate to my situation. As well as being a mama, I am a medstudent. Infact I have just finished my finals! I am planning on a career in surgery and work daily to make it happen. I got to thank you all especially Dragonchic you didn't know it but you just helped me through a hard time. THANK YOU
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