Kev just set up internet here at home. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get on here for a while. Friday was the last day of work. I had to train the new gal so I had no time to talk to my favorite people (you all). Glad to be here. Four days feels like a long time. I have pink highlights in my hair just like I promised. I'll figure out how to send a picture tomorrow I hope. Anyway, hope everyone is doing great.
This is my last week of work. I'm flip-flopping between extreme elation and absolute terror. I have to say that you mamas who stay home are so very brave. Just the thought of what I will do with my time scares me. I know I will end up being busy (or will I?). I wonder if I will absentmindedly get up every morning and get ready to go to work. I have secured myself a job cleaning one of DH's buddies houses once or twice a month. He's a bachelor, but an extremely neat one. His house is perfectly clean but if he wants to pay me to do it, I will.
The other issue is the serious (?) conversations between DH and me about a second child. I let the idea fade to the back of my mind until we went to see a friend's new baby. Then it was stuck in my head. He finally told me I might as well just stop taking the pill. This, after several beers for the both of us and our friends egging him on. I do want another one, I think, but I want him to be happy about it. He cannot make this decision just to appease me. But, if he does, I'm ready to get started.
I've been on painkillers for the last two days, not strong ones, but I feel VERY relaxed. Somehow I've been thinking about odd things.
What kind of lunchbox did you carry as a kid? I had a Popeye lunchkit (as we say in the south). It was one of the old metal ones. I don't think I ever had a plastic one. Do you remeber the smell those things had? That's the only one I really remember, but I do have a vision of something with Dukes of Hazzard on it. It may have been a breakfast tray or something.
What was your favorite cartoon? Mine was Tom and Jerry. But secretly, I loved this stupid cartoon called Beverly Hills Teens. It was kind of like the Archies but the kids were all super rich and had helicopters and limos with hot tubs in the back.
I'm sorry but I must get this out before I explode.
I HATE WHEN:
people look at my sideways
people catcall me or make crude remarks to me
people think they're queen shit
people don't let me speak
people assume I'm an idiot because I'm young, blond and wear lots of pink
someone tells me mothering is hard work when their husband is at home all day with their baby, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, cooking dinner, and she sometimes "didn't even play with my baby today, just went to bed"
people stand in the very center of the sidewalk
younger people think its cool to shout obscenities at each other in public
Just a quick hello. I had lots to say today, but I spent all my free time at work reading up on the dramatic weekend here. I always miss the big debates. Not that I'm sorry about that. I would have had lots to say about the initial issue, but I will let the sleeping dog lie. Out of time today. I will catch up tomorrow. Hope you all had a good Monday
I just gave my two weeks notice. Very hard. They knew this day was coming, but not this quickly. Last night was the very last straw. I picked Macy up from daycare and I was told she didn't nap. Then the director said "Oh, she had a great day today" to which I replied, "well, she didn't nap". And she says "oh well I wasn't here all day so I didn't know that". Well how the hell would she know Macy had a great day if she wasn't even there that day!? Then I get home and chnge her diaper. She has these big red marks on her hips where the diaper was to tight and rubbing her. She never has gotten these with me.
I'm going to the libray tonight. Any good recommendations?
Can anyone please tell me what this will be like? Macy has been unusually crabby recently. I would stick my finger in her mouth and feel, but she'd bite the shit out of me if I did. All her other teeth came in fine and all before she was a year old. How do I know for sure that's the problem? Or could I be in denial that this is just what being a toddler is like. She's normally so happy. The whining is driving me batty!
I just wanted to say how much better I've been lately. So many of you helped me out when I was crashing a while back. I really appreciate it and I am so much better these days.
I am waiting to leave my job. Hopefully that will happen soon but I'm trying to be patient with them. Also trying to save up a little money which is proving to be impossible.
I have been spending a lot of time with my best friend from high school. We parted ways about 8 years ago and its is so nice to be friends with her again. It makes me feel like myself. I think that was part of my problem. I think we all know the feeling of losing our identity. Well I'm taking mine back. I need fun and lightness in my life.
So, my best friends bridashower/bachelorette party was Saturday (finally). Her maid of honor (not me) planned the whole thing. In theory it was a decent plan. However, she was the party nazi the whole day. I think she had this vision in her head about how everything show go exactly right and should anything throw that plan off the world would end. So we went to this inn in the mountains, very beautiful. There were about 40 people at the shower. Very nice, speeches, gifts a little food, etc. Then we were stuck there for about 4 hours after that to wait for dinner that had been planned. So dinner finally came and I must say mmmmmmmm. I think it was the best part about his whole ordeal. We sat outside by the river under a white canopy and drank red sangria and ate. There were only ten of us by then which was better. After we all made the drive down from the mountains to my house where the "bachelorette party" was to begin. So we did cake (disgusting penis shaped brown cake made by MOH)gifts and games. By this time it is 10pm(!) and time to leave to go to the hotel downtown and meet the limo!?! After hemhawing with her sisters about whether or no they would go, MOH finally got the show on the road. We get to the hotel and drag all this shit up to the rooms (blankets, sheets, sleeping bags, radio, are we camping or at a hotel for fucksake, I carried a tote bag) Okay, we get the limo which is ridiculous in my opinion. But no one wanted my opinion in this matter. We go to PT's. I don't know if you have a PT's in your city but please, if you do, DO NOT GO THERE. It is a dance club/strip club. Now here's where it gets more interesting and I figure out I may be totally sexist. They had two stages for men and like six for women. Of course we sat by the men. Is anyone else grossed out by male strippers? They fact that they are so narcisistic and wax their bodies and pump iron probably 40 hours a week and stare at themselves when they dance just made me want to puke. I can see why men want to watch women dance. Women are beautiful and naturally erotic. But I'm not going to pay a man to shake his banana hammock in my face. If he wants to do that, he needs to pay me. So I endured sitting right in front of these men for about 3 hours. I did try the dance floor once. I dont know whose idea it is to put a regular dance floor in a strip club, but let me strangle this person please. I was fine dancing for about 30 seconds. Then I started to feel hands on my waist. I turned and said "I'm sorry, you cant touch me" and tried to dance more. Then I felt his hard on on my ass. It wasn't worth fighting about so I just walked off, never to return to the floor. Here's a great idea, lets get a bunch of men really horny staring at naked girls and then set them loose on a dance floor with regular women. GREAT IDEA! THANKS! I returned to my chair by the waxed dancing men and sat until it was time (thank god) to go. Finally fell asleep at 3:30am.