shadeshaman's blog

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T-Dizzle Graduated tonight

And so I bid hipmama a fond adieu.
Started on this site when there were still "forums". Have been blogging fairly regularly for over 8 years. But I never got a cover story, never got a mention from the people who publish the site, never a thanks for creating content. It's like being a mom, I suppose. You put it out there into the world and hope it makes a difference, but there's no real way to know.
PM me if you want my email or FB handle.
Wish my children well as they transition into adulthood.
Take care of yourselves and your own children, too.

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Ghost Town

I'm probably not going to be bloggering here anymore. It's a Ghost Town. And, honestly, as T wraps up her high school career and we turn our faces toward college, I feel less and less like "mom" is a way that I self-indentify. Send me a PM with contact info.

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Highlights from this week

1. Registered T-Dizzle for classes at SFSU next fall.
2. Found out that she will be delivering a speech at her graduation from Oakland Tech on the 12th.
3. Realized that the Marcus Foster Scholarship she is receiving will fill the gap in her financial aid, meaning that I won't have to pay for her schooling.
4. Celebrated with bourbon, weed and casual sex.

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old shit that just came up

When I was in college, the second time, I worked at Jack-in-the-Box. I was living on my own, barely surviving on minimum wage. My parents didn’t seem to care too much. I had this friend, Sammy. She worked at J-- with me and took classes at the same college as I. We rode scooters--mopeds-- together and joked about having a scooter gang, The Scooter Babes. She drank a lot more than I did and I think she got more action, in part because she had large breasts. In part because she was willing to use her large breasts to get more action.

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I did a headstand tonight at yoga punx.
T-Dizzle got accepted into the dorms on campus at SFSU.
She was also awarded a $3500 private scholarship.
I don't have someone moving into my house, and I don't need a roommate.
I've a had a few "dates" with a cute, single dad, and I'm having a "date" with a cute economics teacher this week. (date is in quotes because the fucktards here in California refuse to call a date a date.)
I'm playing my second ever Brinicle: Icy Finger of Death gig (solo viola with a looping pedal) this weekend.

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Happy Mother's Day to Us.

This is a little bittersweet. Today is the last Mother's Day for me with a minor child living in my house. My first Mother's Day was in 1991, when I was newly pregnant with L-Dawg. I realize that, like "Dictator for Life", "Mom" is a title one never loses, and year my kids will come over for MD, I'm sure, but they won't be living with me. They might appreciate me more than they ever did when they were little and living under my roof, but it won't be the same.

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boring, yay!

My life is a little boring right now. Got a tax refund check, so a little less stressed about kid housing costs next year; been doing a lot of yoga, so less stressed in a general way (also find it hard to write about, but maybe I will try) and met.....a single dad who is my age and who has a teen son. Dad is a solo parent, and a punky/metaly guy from the same scene as I am. It's very nice, but, as usual, I have no idea if it's going anywhere.
Off to work!

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I can't wait for prom to be over. Then maybe shit with the kid will cool down. Oh, fuck, that's what I thought when her play was done. And Hexmass. And her first semester. And blah blah blah. I have very little interest in the shit that I should have some interest in. I spend waaaaaay too much time playing solitaire, because, at the end, things are all neatly lined up and the computer cheers at me.


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